Vapor Life

Vapor life... My life as it is, as it should be. *********************************************************************************************************** Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep. Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Fupid Pucking Seople

(Artist rendition of my noggin)

Today, In what can only be described as the most monumental display of ineptitude ever even conceived by mere mortals, I became so angry at the stupidity of the people on the other end of my phone that a piece my brain actually hardened into a physical example of my contempt, and broke away.

It hardened into a small chuck and resigned from the rest of my brain and is now free floating in my cranium bumping onto other parts reeking havoc in an already unstable and dangerous place.

“I have never seen anything like it” said the MRI guy at my local hospital. “A piece of his brain is like just floating round in there…” he stammered in disbelief.

Lets face if people, I don’t have a lot of real-estate to spare up there, but the prognoses it that I will still be able to lead a normal, albeit even more jaded life.

"While it is true he will be able to lead a normal life…” stated local brain expert
and local candle maker Dr. Mart Panysmts “its like pouring gasoline on an already raging bonfire of mistrust….” “quality of life is not likely to significantly suffer its really just going to be that much harder on the people around him”

The good news is it is the first documented case of such a cerebral oddity that I will have some sort of foot note in the record books. The bad news is I somehow signed the rights to my story over to Fox when I thought I was ordering a tuna salad sandwich for lunch in the waiting room. Look for my story on an up coming episode of house.

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