Dear Jackhole On The Horn Behind Me

Thank you so much for alerting me that you think its time for me to pull into the intersection with your “double tap” on the ol’ horn there.

The fact that you can not even see around my vehicle while you are driving you 2.5 kids to advanced placement pre-soccer registration in that foreign moss-covered, three-handled family credenza mobile does not even play into your thinking does it. I mean of course you know better than I how I should drive my vehicle; I bow to your wisdom.

And that little “beep beep” is the perfect delivery method for that information you are trying to convey to me, thank you so much… what would I ever do without you.

I don’t know what I was thinking not plunging right into the fray, I mean those 30 extra seconds you wasted behind me could have been spent at home with your spouse trying to make the best of you loveless marriage, and getting your microwave frozen dinner onto your Ikea table into time to watch American Idol and laugh at the idiots who you think have it worse than you. At least those people are giving life a shot, genius, what have you done lately?

I mean besides that whole “toot toot” thing you got going, that’s worth something for sure. I have to go now petition the Nobel people for to add a stupid jackhole driver category just I can nominate your horn honking ass. You have to be the best I have ever heard.

Thank you again, so much I know that I am now a better driver because of you and more importantly, a better listener.